Lack of confidence has you hiding out when you are really wanting to Stand Out and
accomplish things that are important to you.
Do you settle for what you get rather than asking for what you want?
Are you panicked thinking about speaking up in a meeting or giving a presentation?
Do you stop yourself from taking action because you are afraid you’ll look stupid?
Are you passionate about something but afraid to lead or ask others to support you?
Do you not say something when someone says a sexist or discriminatory joke?
All of these situations are related to lack of confidence.
What is confidence?
Confidence is a belief in your ability to rely on yourself. To trust yourself to achieve what you set out to do. Lack of it is a mighty force that holds us back from creating the life we really desire. Without confidence you become paralyzed in pursuing your desires and disappointed in your ability to feel fulfilled.
What you need is self-belief and action.
How do you grow your self-belief?
Self-belief can grow by knowing your personal values, strengths and what really matters to you. It is knowing yourself intimately. When you have a strong foundation of who you are it is easier to put yourself in new situations and express yourself without worry about what others think or past results. As you take each step, you can evaluate and make decisions based on what you truly value and want in your lives. This builds your confidence and trust. When you believe in yourself your world becomes very expansive and supportive.
Here are 3 resources for you to create a very strong and empowered inner foundation for yourself.
What Values Are Really Important to You. Values are your identity. They organically arise within you. To know your values is to know yourself.
Find Your Strongest Life by Marcus Buckingham. Living life based on your strengths rather than focusing on your weakness positively changes the results you get in your life. You can let go of all the things you thought you needed to be in order to be successful/happy/fulfilled that aren’t really you. Let go and Be the brilliant juicy mess you are!
The Passion Test by Janet and Chris Attwood. Learn what 5 things are the most important for you to accomplish right now and go for them. What you focus on grows. Keep your attention on what really matters the most to you and stop thinking you have to focus on everything.
Your Main Purpose In Life is to express YOU and go after what makes you feel fulfilled and brings you joy.
What ACTIONS do I need to take?
- Do the above processes and learn about yourself as deeply as you can.
- Take action, use you voice, your gifts, ask for support, embody your values and strengths…
- Notice what scares you and why and then use the information from the test above to empower you to take actions in spite of your fear.
- Let your callings, values and strengths support you in doing what feels right and good to you. Move beyond your old ways and past history to living in the present moment making choices guided by your authentic identity.
- Stop the negative self-talk and comparing yourself to others. There is no one like you! Look inside and uncover the real YOU, (not the conditioned/programmed you) and express her to your world. You were meant to STAND OUT not blend in.
Every step you take to authentically express yourself and
shine your light in service will increase you confidence!
Confidence is gained. Practice, Practice, Practice being true to yourself and get out there and do the things that are uncomfortable, but feel valuable to you. Start using your voice, speaking up, showing up, standing out and empowering others to do the same through your own actions. If you will learn from each experience with compassion instead of critical judgements and comparisons you will grow your confidence little by little. It is accumulative actions that build the trust.
Also, know that when something is important to you, you will be nervous. Being nervous or anxious doesn’t always mean you aren’t confident or can’t be trusted. It can mean you care deeply and want to do a good job, serve in a big way, and have an impact that is dear to your heart.
I use to be painfully shy and insecure. I gain my confidence the same way I am sharing with you and my clients, by discovering who I uniquely AM while removing the lies that I was believing about myself. Each day I take actions in the direction of living my passions and purpose, one step at a time, using my strengths and values to guide me.
As you learn more about what you’re made up of; strengths, values, passions and purpose, you gain confidence and trust in yourself as you start to honor and live from KNOWING who you truly ARE.
Building your confidence will increase your ability to have greater influence, find trusting and loving friends and partners, build successful businesses, careers and community.
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Give me a call if you want help growing your confidence and trust so you can make a difference, sooner rather than later, in the world. The world needs you NOW!